Thursday, March 15, 2012

Feeling a little lost...

2 years and 2 months ago, this was me:


Now, this is me in my new super-cute happy-green spring coat! (Ignore the fact that I don't have on any makeup):
I would have loved a better full-body shot, but this is the best my computer camera can do.  And I swear that I do still have hands (although that's a quick way to lose a couple of pounds...just kidding, kids).

Most days I don't really recognize either of these people as ME.

Everyone seems to talk about the weight struggle, or food, or exercise, and what I want to know is if anyone else finds their "self" lost.  I'm not who I want to be yet (maybe after another 15-20 lost?) and I'm not who I was (when my deepest relationship was with the pizza delivery guy--I'm serious, btw.  They probably think I died).  I hear people talk about being comfortable in their own skin, and all I can think is, "Yeah, but how much skin are you actually talking about?  I, after all, have lots of skin that I'd be happy to donate to someone else who needs it."

I'm a bit adrift and at a loss.  When will all of this skin become comfortable?  Any suggestions?

7 comments:

  1. You look so fantastic! I think you're right. It takes time to mentally catch up with the physical changes.

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  2. Well, I have days when I feel absolutely awesome about how I look (and feel!) and then I have some moments when I hate the skin, and still think that I'm too "fat"...

    My personal goal is to lose another -10lbs and then I want to re-evauluate (Dr. S would like to see another -20 gone! eeep!) I think that being comfortable in your own skin in the WLS patient's holy grail. Not sure when or how we get there, but stay tuned.

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  3. I think it takes time. Before I ever had weight problems, I wasn't comfortable with me.

    I've had other sorts of body issues. I had three miscarriages, and I really hated my body for a while because of its failure.

    For a while, when I was big, I was comfortable with me but the "me" in my head didn't match the actual me. I always saw myself as smaller than I really was.

    Now, I'm smaller than I see myself, and but I am closer than ever to feeling comfortable with me and appreciating what my body does do.

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  4. I like the idea of donating my excess skin for skin grafts for burn victims. I've got plenty too after my weight loss. If you find anyone who is willing to fund this type of thing count me in!

    Seriously though, I don't worry about it so much anymore. I still haven't the nerve to wear a swimsuit but maybe this summer I will. I used to wear long sleeves even in warm weather to hide the loose skin on my arms. I started having hormonal swings causing hot flashes so I had to forgo the extra layer of clothing. I got over it.

    Keep up the good work. Best wishes,
    Marlena of Mohegan

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  5. Checking in on you...since we go to different SG, I never catch up with you. Send me an email if you get a chance, it would be good to chat! (You can send me one through my blog!)

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  6. sandhi sudha plus says that ,
    that blog is really awesome posting i like it very much ..
    DENGUE

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  7. Sometimes our bodies are able to do amazing transformations! You just have to make regular actions directed for that and never stop on your way. For me physical activity works best. In order to recover properly after my workouts I am taking Second Wind by Military Grade. This is new vegetarian post-workout supplement which increases muscles longevity. It helps muscles to recover quickly and reduces the soreness. My body is grateful and willing to exercise whenever I ask it to :)

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